A letter to my 20 year old self

Birthdays are always a very reflective time for me and since this year marks my 30^th birthday, I have been reflecting on my past 10 years. A lot can happen in a decade and I wanted to mark this occasion on my blog by sharing a letter that I wrote to my 20 year old self. Obviously, my 20 year old self is now a 30 year old and these lessons have been learnt, but I wanted to write this letter to reflect on the things that God has brought me through during my 20s. I wanted to remind myself of the journey He has taken me on and to share with those who are standing 10 years behind me the lessons and experiences that they may go through before they reach 30.

“Dear Daisy,

You have made it to your 20s and I am certain that you think you know it all and you have figured out life. You have so much to learn and so much to experience. Let me tell you:

You will grow in your faith!

This is the time that you will learn the most yet about God and what it means to be a Christian. You will see the true power of the word of God and you will persevere in prayer. You will pick up unconventional ways of thinking, and even at times, your friends and family won’t understand your stance. Don’t be afraid to be peculiar and stand apart from this world. It will be hard sometimes but God will honour you and you will grow in Him.

You will make wrong choices

I am so sad to write this, but you will make decisions that will change the course of your 20s. Decisions that will take time to overcome, but God is faithful. Through much prayer, study and persevering effort, God will help you to stand again and will override events to make bitter trials a blessing and you will be a better you. Just guard your choices and your associations going forward.

You will move!

Yes, you will leave London with no job and no plans except a burning desire to follow God’s leading. Your new home will be in Wales and you will learn lessons in patience, diligence, perseverance, trust and waiting on the Lord.

You will have your heart broken

…but the Lord “healeth the broken in heart and bindeth up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3. You will trust God to heal from past hurts and you will grow to love Him more deeply. He will show you that “true love is a high and holy principle, altogether different in character from that love that is awakened by impulse, and which dies when severely tested.” Adventist Home pg. 50. He will show you his standards and He will keep and guard your heart.

You will see miracles

God will come through for you at the 11^th hour! Things that you thought were impossible, He will make happen for you…even when you are tempted to disbelieve. Have more faith and remember “…all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to his purpose” Romans 8:28 and “No good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly” Psalm 84:11.

You will lose loved ones

Three times round…but God will give you strength. He will turn every teardrop into glittering stones and diamonds rare. He will leave you with precious memories to keep in frames of gold and silver, and the blessed hope of the resurrection.

You will travel

Yes, from America, to the Netherlands, to Spain, to Norway, to Paris, Berlin and many other places. God will give you new experiences as you experience different cultures, meet new people and He will give you precious memories to carry home with you.

You will be misunderstood, talked about and hated

I must tell you this…often this can be the reality. Everybody likes to be liked…but that is not what is promised. Remember, Jesus was misunderstood, talked about and hated. He knows the pains of these things yet He encourages you to keep moving forward and to trust in Him. No matter how hard you try Daisy, people may be bent on misunderstanding you, people may have so many things to say about you, people may even hate you…but it’s ok, just make sure nothing makes you bitter and that you rise above all slights. Make sure that your heart doesn’t harbour any hatred for  anyone. God will give you strength to draw warmth from coldness.

You will be betrayed

But it will teach you about wisdom and discernment. Remember the lord is a “man of war” (Exodus 15:3) He will fight for you. Just be content in knowing that all things are recorded in the books of heaven, and God will take care of things. Rest.

You will feel alone

…but you won’t be alone. Remember, being alone and being lonely are two different things. One is a state of being and one is a state of mind. Remember if Christ is all you have…you have everything. You will be alone, but not lonely.

You will have the best year of your life

The year 2014 will be the best year of your life!!! The gospel will do so much for you and you will experience true joy and peace. You will feel alive and will praise God for mountains climbed. However, sadly tough times will come upon you in the next few years but the experiences of this year and the grace of God will carry you through.

You will be greatly loved

By your heavenly father and by all of those faithful ones He will put along your path. You will rejoice in the blessedness of fellowship and you in turn will love. Make sure you cherish those blessed ones, never take them for granted and always pray for them by name.

You will learn that some friendships are just for a season.

Remember when you thought all your secondary school friends would be your friends now?

“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven…” Ecclesiastes 3:1

And this is also the case for friends, even in your 20s you will experience more “growing apart. God has a purpose and a plan for you – remember where God is taking you, sadly not all can go with you…even if you want them to. This may also be the case for them – maybe where they are going, you cannot go.  It will be painful and sometimes baffling, but you’ve just got to trust God’s wisdom and trust the process. Just like the autumn season, trees have to let go of leaves in order to grow and enter into the next season. Thank God for the season and thank God for growth.

You will start a blog

And what an experience that will be. You will blog about faith, love, marriage, sheep (lol), moving, loss, relationships, contentment, friendships and much more.  God will give you the courage to be bold about your faith and the grace to be candid and share intimate details of your life. Remember even if one person is blessed by your blog, your mission has been accomplished.

You will learn that what will be will be

Learn to accept things and move on. Allow God to order and direct your steps and He will bring it to pass. Always remember that the best place to ever be is in the centre of God’s will.

You will experience trials

…and you will learn patience. You will learn to be still and trust God…even when you don’t understand. Our trials are weighed and measured in heaven before being given to us so always remember “God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.” 1 Corinthians 10:13.  He will never give you more than you can bear.

“Our sorrows do not spring out of the ground. God “doth not afflict willingly nor grieve the children of men.” Lamentations 3:33. When He permits trials and afflictions, it is “for our profit, that we might be partakers of His holiness.” Hebrews 12:10. If received in faith, the trial that seems so bitter and hard to bear will prove a blessing. The cruel blow that blights the joys of earth will be the means of turning our eyes to heaven. How many there are who would never have known Jesus had not sorrow led them to seek comfort in Him! The trials of life are God’s workmen, to remove the impurities and roughness from our character. Their hewing, squaring, and chiseling, their burnishing and polishing, is a painful process; it is hard to be pressed down to the grinding wheel. But the stone is brought forth prepared to fill its place in the heavenly temple. Upon no useless material does the Master bestow such careful, thorough work. Only His precious stones are polished after the similitude of a palace.” Thoughts from the Mount of Blessing pg. 10

You will rejoice at the end of days!

Life may not have worked out as you expected it to but you will rejoice at his unfailing faithfulness and loving kindness. As you enter your 30s your anthem and song will be “Great is thy faithfulness” (Lamentation 3:23) and you will sing Daisy…and not be silent.

“Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness; To the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.”

Psalm 30: 11-12

With overflowing love, 

♥ Miss Daisy ♥ (Your 30 year old self)

Stay in touch with me 

Email: missdaisyspetals@gmail.com
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Dear Auntie Molly: In loving memory of Molly Mirembe Kulongo

A personal letter that I wrote and posted to Auntie Molly on the 7^th of March 2016.

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Dear Auntie Molly,

Greetings from your daughter and friend Daisy. You have been deeply in my thoughts and I am sad to admit that I have not stayed in touch with you like I should have and would have liked to. Please forgive me.

I was speaking to a friend before the New Year who was telling me about the words that she shared at her grandmother’s funeral.  She told me that while she was speaking, she realised that she wasn’t saying anything that her grandmother didn’t already know. Oftentimes it’s only when someone passes away that we begin to express our deep feelings towards them and highlight the good things about them. We can even express things that perhaps we didn’t share with them while they were still on this earth.

For this purpose I am writing you this letter.

Auntie, I know that you are currently wrestling with the idea as to whether you may fall asleep sooner rather than later, and I don’t want to wait until then (whenever that may be) to open my heart to you and to express my deep love and gratitude for all that you are and all that you have been to me.

I write you this letter not because you are dead but because in Christ you are ALIVE!

Being a teenager and somewhat new Christian isn’t easy. I remember when I decided to start attending Beckton Maranatha SDA Church and how Aunties such as yourself, Auntie Sarah, Auntie Justine, Auntie Rebecca, Auntie Ruth and Mrs Kavuma really embraced me and looked after me in the absence of my parents. Back then I didn’t appreciate your correction regarding my low cut tops, short skirts, tight clothes and black nail vanish but now I am truly thankful for your consistency and persistence in lovingly showing me the error of my ways.

Transitioning into womanhood I learnt so much from you. By example you showed me what it means to be a woman, a wife and a mother. I watched you open your home to anyone who was in need. You allowed us to use your home for youth bible studies, choir practice, Beckton Sisters recordings, church meetings, social gatherings and even somewhere just to hang out; your home is known to be a safe haven and a place of refuge to many. I remember when visitors would come to the house at night just before you were about to go to bed and you would come downstairs and cook for them and host them. I have seen how God has blessed you and Uncle with 5 precious jewels and how you have offered them back to Him. Each one of your children has played such a significant part in my life and walk with God.

Speaking of being a wife, I remember one morning when you burst into the girls’ room and pretty much told us that we were all too young to get married, and you began to tell us about the true realities of the married life. Auntie, though we were quite unresponsive, texting on our phones while you were talking and generally appeared indifferent, I must admit (especially in my case) that you were right. I truly appreciate the words you shared with us that morning and I have taken note of them. Auntie you truly left no stone unturned, you even spoke to us about the importance of cleanliness and female hygiene, I remember writing about it in my journal hehe :). You have been a living example of your words, and I know this to be true and I can see the fruit of this when I look at Uncle’s deep love for you.

What I cherish the most is our one to one time. I have such good memories of the days I would sit at your bedside and we would talk and talk. I look forward to having more of these moments with you. Auntie, I love the way you show such deep interest in my life choices and especially in my “love life”. I know that you have been praying for me in this area. I know that you long to see the man God (if it is His will) will bring into my life to be my husband and friend. I know that you will be my eyes and my ears and will prayerfully and closely examine his character to see if he is indeed the Lord’s choice. Thank you for the many times you have been a listening ear as I have opened up about my hopes, dreams, doubts and fears.

My sweetest memory with you is when I took some time out to look after you and to cook for you. I cooked so many different vegan dishes for you and Uncle to try, that was a very fun time! I remember asking you if I could practice my massage techniques on you, I know you love massages, so you happily complied :). I know we had our disagreements about chicken and cups of Tetley’s tea, but I honestly enjoyed that time with you. It was a delight to serve you, thank you for giving me an opportunity to live out my faith practically. I learnt so much about what it means to be a medical missionary and to love as Christ loves - seeking to love and draw near to those who He came to save.

Last but not least, I have been thinking about your faith, your love for your Creator, your prayerfulness and your tireless efforts in the women’s ministry department. I once heard that our trials are weighed and measured in heaven before being given to us. To me this means that anything that may befall us is fully considered and assessed before it even touches us. This thought was coupled with the thought that God will not give us more than we can bear. God knows Auntie, that in Him you can face anything. You have been through so much these past few years but you have shown yourself strong in the face of bitter and painful trials. You have clung to your Saviour and Friend, trusting that he will carry you through.  Though you have been disappointed, disheartened and discouraged you always speak of His goodness. I have never heard you speak negatively of God for anything that has befallen you.

In Him you have an unbreakable spirit.

You have proven faithful to God in all your tests and trials and you will prove faithful even in this! Please continue to give Him your whole heart, trust and believe Auntie. Please Auntie, know and believe that God has not forgotten about you. He longs to walk by the way with you – by waters still and deep through places high and steep, He will lead you. Your dear Shepheard wants to guide you through paths of peace and righteousness. Though you feel like you are face to face with death, believe that in all things He is faithful and know that you are still beloved of your God. Remember Christ’s precious blood was shed that you may have life! On this earth, regardless of any sickness, In Christ you do have life and have it more abundantly. His love for you is indomitable and stronger than sickness, suffering and death.

Thank you for holding on for so long Auntie, hold on a little bit longer, His grace is still sufficient for you. Thank you for setting such a good example. I pray that we may seek to be faithful to God that we may stand victorious on that sea of glass and if not we’ll definitely meet at the tree of life. But until then, while on this earth, may our love for our God be pure, passionate, unhindered, resilient, unreserved, unconquerable and endless.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?

….For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. 

Romans 8:35, 38-39

With overflowing love

Daisy

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The letter arrived safely in London and I asked Auntie’s youngest son Ivan if he could read the letter to her. Interestingly, every time he went to visit her in hospital he kept forgetting the letter at home, even though he was sure he had put it in his inside pocket. To cut a long story short, providentially I ended up reading her the letter on the 12^th of March 2016, when I went to visit her in hospital.

Sadly Auntie Molly passed away on Friday the 1^st of April 2016. I was deeply saddened as I honestly didn’t think that that would be the last time I would see her, but at the same time happy to know that our last memory together was me reading her this letter.  I got to do with Auntie, what she enjoyed the most and what we did the best; I got to sit at her bedside and talk with her, for one final time…

…Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord from henceforth: Yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labours; and their works do follow them. 
Revelation 14:13

Rest Auntie, We shall speak again very soon x

♥ Miss Daisy ♥

A letter to a hurting friend

I would like to share a letter that I wrote to a friend last summer. Generally I can be a very private person but I’m beginning to learn that sometimes it’s important to be open and to share aspects of your life or personal experiences to help someone who needs to be encouraged.

If you are hurting maybe this will encourage you too?

For anonymity purposes I will refer to this friend as Mindy.

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Dearest Mindy

I see your current change of environment as a turning point for you and the beginning of a new journey. I know currently you feel lost and without hope and I know that deep down you desire to get your life back and to get back with God. The above things may seem so far away from you but know that even today, as you read this letter God is in the process of drawing you back to him. The journey has already begun!

I would like to open up my heart to you and share with you a story.

In 2012/2013 I was so broken and far from God. My life was a complete train wreck and no matter how hard I tried (in my own strength) I just couldn’t see beyond or rise above my pain and disappointment. I think it was in December 2013 that I finally cracked. I realised that I could no longer try and “live” without pursuing Christ. My life would always be empty and dry, I needed the fountain of living water!

As hard as it was I decided to be intentional about seeking the Lord and truly giving my heart to Him. I started by resolving to wake up at 5am every morning to spend time with Him (whatever that meant to me at the time). I knew that I was on some sort of journey and I knew I had to trust in the Lord and take things a day at a time. I needed a tangible way to document my journey back to the Lord so I decided to write a daily journal, writing one page a day. I wrote to the lord and told him about my day to day life, my hopes and aspirations in Him… I told Him what I had learned in my devotional time and asked Him to help me with scriptures that I didn’t understand. I asked Him to help me when I had issues with my car. I spoke to Him when I was upset, happy, sad, excited, confused… I opened up to Him about my weaknesses and asked for strength to overcome. Many times I wrote to Him in confession and repentance.

Over a period of time (quite quickly actually) Christ became my heart’s one choice, my greatest confidant and truest companion and friend. I felt alive Mindy, after being dead for a long time. Sometimes I look back at my journal entries and my experiences and as painful as things were at the time I can now see how God’s hand was in it. Christ used it all to help me to grow and to develop. I am so thankful to Him and I can honestly say I wouldn’t have had things any other way.

As I am writing my experience, these words came to mind, “In Jesus we have an enduring, unchanging friend, and though all earthly prospects should fail and every earthly friend prove treacherous, yet He is faithful still.” Manuscript Releases Vol 12 page 115

Please see enclosed a gift from a friend to a friend. I know that you are so hurt and broken at the moment but I believe God can give you beauty for ashes. Pain shapes the most beautiful things in the world. I know that God has a plan for you, I know that He is on your side, and that He will take this situation and use it for His glory and for your benefit. Please Mindy put your trust in Him and give Him access to your heart. Please don’t take this gift lightly please commit to the journey. I encourage you to be intentional about spending quiet time before the Lord and to write (as least one page) in your new journal every day.

I believe this time next year things will be a lot different and you will look back at everything while reading your journal and you will give all glory to God. Let it be beautiful Mindy, allow Christ to work on your heart.

I love you Mindy (even though I’m not always the best at saying it or showing it) you are a special and precious friend to me. I am glad that God has allowed us to share a close friendship on this earth. I can’t wait to see you happy again and I am looking forward to seeing what God is going to do in your life.

With overflowing Love,

xx Daisy xx

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Proverbs 17:17  A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

Love, your girl forever,

♥ Miss Daisy ♥

A Letter to a Bride to Be

Last December my close friend Anike got married. I was so overwhelmed when she asked me to be her Chief Bridesmaid and to travel with her to Nigeria for the wedding. I was so excited and couldn't wait to share the experience with her!  With that said, you could probably imagine how utterly devastated I was when plans for me to go to Nigeria didn't work out. I was so upset but nevertheless I wanted to be there for her so as a special token (and as part of a group bridal shower gift) I decided to write her a letter before she left for Nigeria.

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Dear Miss Anike Akinrinlade,

Wow this is the last time I will be writing your name in this way as you are soon to be known as Mrs Anike Igunnu. Congratulations sweetie!!!!

We have known each other since we were 11/12 years old and I have seen you grow into a beautiful, intelligent and God fearing woman. Anike, you have truly come a long way in your journey with the Lord and I am so thankful that he has allowed you to enter into this wonderful new season. It feels like only yesterday we were talking about our desire for God to bless us with a Godly man and, for you my dear Anike, that time has come and God has truly provided.

Anike, choose to love Tope daily even when your feelings tell you otherwise. Remember that love is a high and holy principle, it is not a feeling, it remains steadfast, immovable and doesn’t die when severely tested. When test and trials come, meet them together in the strength of Christ with fortitude and courage.

Do all you can to make your home a little heaven where Tope can find rest and refreshment in your love and God willing one day in the love of your children. Seek daily to be a husband and wife that please God, forsaking all rude, harsh, angry and unpleasant words and choosing to speak loving, kind, pure and affectionate words to each other. Keep Christ as the central pillar of your home remembering that He is the cord that binds your hearts together in love.

I’m so happy for you Anike and I pray that all the blessings that God intends to bestow on the marriage union will be yours as you both walk faithfully with the Lord bringing Him into your home and hearts daily.

I would like to leave you with two of my favourite quotes:

“Love cannot be commanded; it cannot be won by force or authority. Only by love is love awakened.” The Desire of Ages pg 22

“The Presence of Christ alone can make men and women happy. All the common waters of life Christ can turn into the wine of heaven. The home then become as an Eden of bliss; the family, a beautiful symbol of the family in heaven”. The Adventist Home pg 28

May your married life be a foretaste of heaven.

With Overflowing Love

♥ Miss Daisy ♥

Anike and I at Heathrow Airport at 5am. Bidding the bride to be goodbye.