Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts

Monday, 27 February 2017

Beautiful Feet: In Loving memory of Anike Igunnu

If there was ever a day that I could say my heart broke, it was on the 22nd of September 2016, when we lost our beloved wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend.


I thought this would be the easiest thing to write…right? I have an abundance of words that testify of just how wonderful Anike was, yet 5 months have passed and I still cannot seem to write…


Let me ask you a question, how do you sum up (in one blog post) over 15 years of friendship? Years that have been cut short so quickly and unexpectedly?


Sometimes, I sit there and try and reason it all out and to me it just doesn’t seem logical that Anike, the person that was such a major part of my life, is no longer here. I can’t get my head around the fact that I can search this whole earth and never find her…

Sometimes I am tempted to deal with it by pretending that, maybe this hasn’t happened, she isn’t gone...we just haven’t spoken in a while….However, the reality is, we spoke every week, we prayed every Wednesday morning…and this is the reality!


In those painful moments, I ask the Lord for comfort and he gives me something beyond precious….he gives me the gift of memories.


So today on what would have been Anike’s 28th birthday, I want to embrace and share this gift and remember Anike’s beautiful life and especially her beautiful feet.


A small collection of memories





Anike - First Encounter


Anike and I both attended the same secondary school. We officially met one day on the Newham Leisure Centre Bridge on our way home from school. I always feel like Anike and I were destined to meet – We both applied to go to St Angela's Ursuline School, we didn’t get in. Our natural second choice was Royal Docks Community School (this was the secondary school that most people living in Custom House area went to and both of our older brothers went there), we couldn’t get in...so we both ended up at Kingsford Community School. Since meeting our friendship began to blossom especially as she began to demonstrate a deep love for God and wisdom beyond her years. She was such a good influence! Almost every day after school, a small group of us would go to her grandma’s house for prayer, bible study etc. It was such a blessed experience as I learnt that the bible did have the answers I needed and the bible did teach me of Christ. During that time I gave my life to Christ and began to keep the true seventh day Sabbath (Saturday). Anike was such a blessing and I've never had a friend who has been so consistent in nurturing my walk with God and keeping me on track.

18 year old Anike and I 


Anike - The Christian


I never thought that I could meet someone of my age that was so committed to God. Even in secondary school, Anike was so highly respected as someone who loved and feared God. I remember when Anike taught me that I could pray to God to help me with my exams, those days I was so young in faith that I didn’t think that you could take absolutely anything to God in prayer. As the years went on Anike’s faith grew stronger and bolder. I watched how much she trusted in the Lord in the face of rejection, setbacks and delays. I watched her fully embrace God’s providential leading when she had her son earlier than expected. This was definitely a trying time for Anike but she didn’t murmur or complain but kept a very positive and cheerful spirit. Anike was a true example of the blessedness that comes from standing apart and choosing to follow God’s ways from an early age.


Bride to be - Nigeria 2014



Anike – My Friend


They say “Friends tell you things that you don’t want to tell yourself” This is true of Anike. She was always objective, just and fair; she would always make you see it from another point of view. I loved the way Anike was so truthful and how much she chose to challenge me as opposed to flatter me. I remember one time I was stressing about my living situation and I called her looking for sympathy and she told me “You’re not going to be homeless Daisy, so relax! You need to stop complaining and start exercising some spiritual maturity”…honestly, guys I’ve never had someone in my life that just brings so much perspective to situations.


In additional to her advice and profound words of wisdom, Anike was someone who invested in people. She would always make time (she was a very busy and committed young lady) to nurture her friendships and stay in touch with friends and family. Since secondary school/college Anike and I have been long distant friends; I moved away to go to university, she worked and studied abroad, then I moved to Wales and she got married and moved to Gloucestershire. Though separated by distance Anike was extremely committed and consistent in staying in touch with me, even when I got lazy and wouldn’t call, she was very intentional about maintaining our friendship.


Also, Anike was very fun to be around! I remember such great times at her house. Memories of us talking, listening to music, Anike cooking for me (I would literally come to her house fully expecting to be fed lol), biblical discussions etc. Anike was always accepting of other people’s personalities and differences. Those days I was very very playful and it would manifest itself the most at Anike house lol! But instead of finding it annoying, she would join me and it made for such good times.

Anike visiting me at university 

Anike - Wedding session


This season was so exciting!!! I remember when Anike and Tope got engaged and the wedding planning began. She asked me to be her Maid of Honour and I was completely flabbergasted but extremely honoured. I didn’t get to go to her wedding in the end but I was determined to help her every step of the way. I remember us looking for bridesmaid’s dresses and hairstyle together. I remember planning her bridal shower and all the excitement around that. I remember dropping her to the airport (her wedding was in Nigeria), bidding her farewell as a single woman. This was such a blessed experience to share with her, but the most precious part was the unnumbered hours we spent in prayer in the lead up to the wedding; praying for her wedding, her marriage, her husband etc


Beautiful Bride - 20th December 2014

Anike - For the last time


It was Wednesday morning on the 21st of September and both Anike and I forgot to call each other that morning for prayer. She called me when I was on my way to work, which is something we would always do! After apologies for letting each other down, Anike was sharing some exciting news about visiting Kirgizstan! I was like “Wow Anike, of all places!” Anike was such a traveller and so adventurous! She had come down to Wales as she had a few things to do in Newport, and she was hoping that we could meet up. I really wanted to see her (the last time we saw each other was end of May that year) but at the time I assumed Newport was over 2 hours’ drive from me (a few days ago I realised that it’s just an hour L ) so I didn’t think we could meet up at all that day. I got to work and had to rush in, so I cut our conversation short and ended it by saying “Anike, I’ve just got into work, so I’m gonna have to speak to you later, yea!”.


When I got to my desk, I felt like I ended the call a bit too abruptly so I texted Anike apologising and said to her that I hope she manages to sort out everything in preparation for Kirgizstan. Little did I know that that would be the last conversation I would have with her.

The next day, I was walking to Tesco on my lunch break and thought to give Anike a call, we often had lunchtime chit chats as well. Her phone rang out for a bit and her husband picked up (not to my surprise) and eventually informed me that Anike had passed away…and in that moment, I dissolved.


I was so heartbroken but mostly confused, how can this be? I was mostly upset that my last ever conversation with her ended so badly. Anike and I would speak often in the morning on our way into work and we would discuss a number of topics, and would always finish our conversations on a positive edifying note…why did that day, of all days, have to be different!

I spent that night in so much pain and disbelief. My heart broke so much for her husband, son, family and friends, and all others she had left behind. I kept thinking about how Anike and I had made so many plans together, she had always been there and I just could not imagine going through any major life event without her there. I finally fell asleep and God comforted my heart with a dream.




The Dream


Anike and I were on the London Underground, and we were both sitting on the Jubilee line just talking. We got to Waterloo Station and Anike was trying to get me to come off with her but I couldn’t get off at that stop as I needed to get the district or circle line from Westminster Station. We hugged and said our goodbyes as the train was slowly pulling into Waterloo Station. The doors opened at the Station and Anike got off the train and faced me. Still on the train, I said to her “God be with you”, Anike was just smiling (her usual signature smile J ) and then I leaned over and kissed her cheeks and said to her “keep smiling”. The doors closed and the train began to pull off, Anike and I were still facing each other. We continued to smile at each other as the train pulled away until we were both out of sight.


This dream coupled with the following readings


Ecclesiastes 9:5-6 For the living know that they shall die: but the dead know not any thing, neither have they any more a reward; for the memory of them is forgotten. Also their love, and their hatred, and their envy, is now perished; neither have they any more a portion for ever in any thing that is done under the sun.



1 Corinthians 15:51-55  Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound, and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed.For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and this mortal must put on immortality. So when this corruptible shall have put on incorruption, and this mortal shall have put on immortality, then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written, Death is swallowed up in victory. O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?



1 Thessalonians 4: 15-18 For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep.For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord. Wherefore comfort one another with these words.


These verses brought so much relief, just knowing that Anike was not angry or upset with me and knowing that it was just goodbye and we would see each other again. Like Apostle Paul says “Comfort one another with these words”


Today I want to express my deep love and overflowing gratitude for Anike’s love, life and influence. I will always cherish her loving nature, bright smile, sweet cheeks. I will never forget her deeply profound wisdom, her Godly strength and feminine grace. Most of all I will miss those beautiful feet…you’re probably all wondering why this blog post is entitled “Beautiful Feet” and why I keep referring to this. The feet I’m talking about are as described in Romans 10:15 “…How Beautiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace, and bring tiding of good things!”


Anike had beautiful feet; she walked this earth so gracefully, blessing those whom she came in contact with. Anike touched so many lives in so many different ways. She touched my life personally by not only being my friend but by leading me (at the age of 12/13) to accept Christ into my heart as my personal saviour…that’s why her feet are so beautiful to me.

Anike and I on my 25th birthday 



Friends and Family of Anike and all who are reading this post, let us be encouraged and choose to walk this earth with dignity and grace, seeking to love and to serve Christ and all those whom he came to save.


May we have Beautiful Feet.


...Last Goodbye

Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord..that they may rest from their labours; and their works do follow them. 
Revelation 14:13 


Anike Igunnu, greatly loved and truly missed



♥ Miss Daisy 


p.s Anike’s Family and Friends have put together a website in memory of Anike,  It is still under construction but please follow this link to find out more - www.anikeigunnu.com  


Also I have blogged about Anike, here, here and here. Check these posts out for more memories.

Monday, 15 August 2016

Commit thy way unto the Lord: Mr and Mrs Anyanwu – First year of marriage - Part 2 (Wife's perspective)

Today is Chiawuotu and Kimberley’s second year marriage anniversary, so to mark this occasion I thought I would share an interview I conducted with them just after their first year of marriage. Some of you may have read their courtship and wedding story, if you haven’t read it please click here for their courtship story and here and here for their wedding story. In this interview they will share some experience from their first year of marriage.
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Wife’s perspective – Interview questions answered by Kimberley Anyanwu
(Click here to read Chiawuotu’s answers)



First of all, Happy Anniversary, and thank you for taking the time to answer these questions.

I guess I’ll start with the question you probably get asked all the time, how are you finding married life?

Married life is refreshing! I see Gods love for me daily - revealed in Chiawuotus friendship. I cannot find words to say how I appreciate having such a close friend and counselor to face lifes changing circumstances with. Its a joy to tackle problems together and also be able to share in each others victories. We have been through so many changing circumstances already and I look back on our wedding day and realise how much closer and stronger our bond and our love is now and how deep it has grown. I feel at rest. I can lean on him for encouragement, leading, advice, ideas, practical help, and a listening ear. Even just his smile lights up my world and my whole day.

So marriage, is it all bliss?

Its definitely all a blessing! But Im not sure about all bliss. If bliss means being in love then yes. But if bliss means always a constant feeling of being elated and the absence of real down-to-earth life challenges then no. Marriage is a school and is a lifework. I have found that learning to be a true wife is gradual and takes practice and attention, and a few mistakes along the way that can sometimes even be disheartening.

Im thinking about 1 Corinthians 7: 4 where it says There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.

 Now a lot of people view this verse as saying that when you get married you wont have much time to nurture a personal relationship with God or give service to him as you now have the added focus of a spouse.

What are your thoughts on this verse? And also how do you keep an eye single to the glory of God and still serve each other as husband and wife? How do you balance your time, priorities, walk with God, home and work life around being married or newly married?

I think its necessary and possible to serve and love both God and my husband Each one should seek in every possible way to please and make happy the members of the family circle:. Faith I Live By page 267.  It is for Gods glory. It helps me be drawn out of myself to think about another each day. This has been a blessing to me and helps my communion with God. It is teaching me Christlikeness and revealing selfish parts of my character which I had not noticed before. True refinement and nobility of soul will be seen in efforts to bless and elevate others. Testimonies to the Church, Volume 2 page  243. Also its not actually about balancing other areas of my life around being married. But instead I am understanding more and more that they are all linked together and the performance of each enhances all other areas of my life. And when in all my duties my object is to glorify God then that is how I keep my eye single to his glory while going about my daily tasks as a wife. Enochs walk with God was not in a trance or vision, but in all the duties of his daily life. He did not become a hermit, shutting himself entirely from the world; for he had a work to do for God in the world. Patriarchs and Prophets page 85.

What sort of things have you learnt in marriage that you wished you had learnt before marriage?

Most of the lessons I have learnt in marriage couldnt have been learnt before and there is not one lesson I can think of which I wish I had learned before.

How have your priorities and responsibility changed since being married?
I am now a wife with a husband to love, understand, encourage, inspire, and care for spiritually, mentally and physically and a home of my own to maintain and reflect Jesus in. 

Ok, if we could look at Ephesians 5: 22-29. I just want to ask you some questions about these verses.22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;26That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

So Kimberley, What has submission meant for you as a wife?

I have realised much more about Christs submission to the Father and how true submission is simply a result of trust and deep love. I have found that submission is not so much about outwardly coming into line with Chiawuotus choices but actively seeking his choice and then inwardly trusting. Submission to me means that I put Chiawuotus wishes before my own and I trust his choices and that he is doing the same for me. Christ thought it not robbery to be equal with God but made himself of no reputation and took upon Him the form of a servant. Philippians 2: 6-7



What advice would you give to young men and women who would like to know more about what submission and leadership really mean or who may have misconceptions about what these two things entail?

I would say study the life of Christ he was both a leader and at the same time his life was the greatest example of submission. I would advise that while many might emphasise the importance of a wife keeping her individuality this does not conflict with true submission. Christ is the greatest example of this. We should guard against thinking that in true submission to another our individuality is being taken away. Study the life of Christ.

I know that you both had your own ministerial pursuits in addition to your joint music ministry Advent Vision.  How have these changed, if at all, since being married?

We have our pursuits still but now since being married they are becoming more of a living reality and more and more attainable.

Would you say that the ideals you had before marriage have been met in your current experience of marriage?

Yes but I based my ideals of marriage on Gods word as best as I could, and I purposefully married a man who would do the same. I think its when we try to meet wrong ideals given us or when we expect false ideals (worldly ideals) from our spouses that we find we cannot meet them or they cannot meet them. However with the correct ideals and a reliance on God there is no reason why we shouldnt meet them and in doing this make home happy.

What kind of marriage myths have been dispelled for you?

One idea that I have been able to fully confirm as a myth is that courtship has better memories than the marriage itself. While now I know by experience that true marriage is on the contrary and just gets better and better.

What have you learnt about communication and dealing with conflict?

Communication is so very vital to marriage. We found that we always need to maintain good communication daily to maintain a good united working home and to promote thoughtfulness of each other. This has helped to prevent conflict, but while we have never been in conflict, we have had misunderstandings, and times when we didnt see things the same way. On all these occasions we have both learnt how important it is not to draw coldly away from each other or jump to conclusions without hearing each other out. We have learnt to be open about thoughts and feelings while being considerate of each others feelings in how we express ourselves at those times.

A lot of people speak about The First Year of Marriage in term of how hard it is. They say things like its the make or break, thats when you get to see how the person is REALLY like and thats when you realise that you may have rushed things or made a mistake. What are your thoughts on these idea based on your first year of marriage? What encouragement can you offer to any newlyweds who may be having this experience?

I would say to those newlyweds who have had a very hard or upsetting first year that I think it is never too late to have a first year of marriage all over again so to speak. I think it will take much more work and much more forgiveness to overcome some foundational problems that you may have laid for yourselves in your first year, but if you persevere and make Christ your guide he will take the worst mistakes and make something more beautiful come out of them. You can have a stronger and deeper love and respect for each other than if those early things had never happened but you both will need to be willing to redeem the time and start at once to lay the right foundation. It will just take a lot more work but it is necessary and you must begin at once.

What are the top 3 things you have learnt during this first year of marriage?

These are the top 3 things I have learnt during our first year of marriage:

A good marriage is not by chance but is from God as the result of submission to his will and teachings in all things and this kind of marriage is held together by the law of service.

The gifts of Jesus are ever fresh and new. The feast that He provides for the soul never fails to give satisfaction and joy. Desire of Ages page 148.

Submission might be harder in reality but it is surely sweeter in reality also.

Finally, what advice would you give to any young newlyweds or any couple who are engaged and about to get married?

Lean not on your own understanding.
Trust in the Lord with all your HEART
God will direct, know and acknowledge His leading.
Many date their success or failure in life from their wedding day.
All Gods biddings are enablings.

Thank you so much Mrs Anyanwu for answering these question, I pray that you have many more happy years of serving God  together as husband and wife.



Not unto us, O Lord, not unto us, but unto thy name give glory, for thy mercy, 
and for thy truth's sake. 
Psalms 115:1



♥ Miss Daisy ♥

Commit thy way unto the Lord: Mr and Mrs Anyanwu – First year of marriage - Part 1 (Husband's perspective)

Today is Chiawuotu and Kimberley’s second year marriage anniversary, so to mark this occasion I thought I would share an interview I conducted with them just after their first year of marriage. Some of you may have read their courtship and wedding story, if you haven’t read it please click here for their courtship story and here and here for their wedding story. In this interview they will share some experience from their first year of marriage.
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Husband’s perspective – Interview questions answered by Chiawuotu Anyanwu
(Click here to read Kimberley’s answers)



First of all, Happy Anniversary, and thank you for taking the time to answer these questions.

I guess I’ll start with the question you probably get asked all the time, how are you finding married life?

Well I must say my first year of marriage has been as honey to my mouth and sunshine to my soul. The sweetest part is always having a friend in Jesus by my side. It’s been a blessing to have someone special to share my day with and work for Christ with. Someone special, to eat with, walk with, talk with, study with, socialise with and live with. My Bride from my side has certainly helped me heavenward, increased my love for God and increased my sphere of influence, so Praise God.

 So marriage, is it all bliss?

I guess it depends what you mean by bliss. I look forward to coming home to my wife and I enjoy the loving atmosphere of heaven that God provides for us each day. However, unlike the castle building ideas some may have I would say marriage is not all romance. Married life has its large responsibilities. The daily work in the office, paying bills, meeting deadlines, supporting family relatives, studying the advancing light of the third angel’s message, ministering in word and song, personal goals, DIY, and helping with housework to name but a few and we don’t even have children yet… :) But when you’re faithful to your duties and always seek to please Christ first, spouse second and self-last, then I would say YES it is bliss, that is, it’s a great joy and a foretaste of heaven.

I’m thinking about 1 Corinthians 7: 34 where it says “There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.” 

Now a lot of people view this verse as saying that when you get married you won’t have much time to nurture a personal relationship with God or give service to him as you now have the added focus of a spouse. 

What are your thoughts on this verse? And also how do you keep an eye single to the glory of God and still serve each other as husband and wife? How do you balance your time, priorities, walk with God, home and work life around being married or newly married?

Married life is different from single life because I have taken on responsibilities which before I was married I did not have. Some of these responsibilities are temporal in nature, however they have eternal consequences e.g. finding a home to live in (Matthew 7:26) providing for my family not only physically but spiritually (1 Timothy 5:8).In the bible marriage is a symbol of the union between Christ and His church (Matthew 25) and so for me personally since being married it has nurtured my relationship with God and helped me to better understand how to love, serve and give myself to Him, as I give myself to my wife daily. (Ephesians 5:25).A lot of people box separately their walk with Christ and their marriage. Although I have times to study, pray and meditate alone, I find my walk with Christ influences my marriage and my marriage influences my walk with Christ.  My behaviour towards my wife everyday tests whether my intellectual reading and bible theory is an abiding experience in my heart and in my home or a false piety. In fact inspiration tells us, ‘The minister’s wife, his children and those who are employed as helpers in his family are best qualified to judge of his piety… Advent Home page 354. So if anything, marriage has been a blessing to help me to understand more about what it means to live to the glory of God in practice from day to day.

What sort of things have you learnt in marriage that you wished you had learnt before marriage?

Not sure really. I am glad I learnt the Lord’s truth for this time so I can know how best to guide and lead my family… I had always desired to learn a manual trade with my hands since coming to the faith should I need for any reason to depend on it for a living. God blessed me to learn one in our countryside home during our DIY exploring in the first year of marriage.

How have your priorities and responsibility changed since being married?

I am now a Priest, Provider and Protector of the home.  My priorities are the happiness of my Saviour and my wife and the advancement of the third angel’s message (Revelation 14)

 

Ok, if we could look at Ephesians 5: 22-29. I just want to ask you some questions about these verses. 22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;26That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:


So Chiawuotu, What has leadership meant for you as a husband? Specifically what do you think Paul means when he says “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word….” Ephesians 5: 25-26

Leadership is about service. As a house band I realise the importance of initiating how to help my wife with things in her day-to-day life, physically, emotionally and spiritually. How can I most help my wife I ask myself? And I find that I can always do more. Leadership also means sacrifice. Yielding up my own wishes to seek to please my wife, without compromising truth or principle. As Christ gave his life and time to save, elevate and enlighten me, I am to give my wife my time to love, elevate and influence her heavenward. It’s good to give flowers, cards or tangible gifts (which by the way, I love to do for my wife) but it’s harder to give yourself, yet that’s exactly what Jesus did. Genesis 22:8 ‘God will provide himself a lamb for a burnt offering.’ I’ve came to learn that the quality time spent together, though a sacrifice, is more valuable than all the tangible gifts that the world could offer. In a similar way Christ gave mankind 33 years of His time on this earth which culminated in the great sacrifice of Himself. Part of the quality time spent together is in beholding Him through His prophetic word as Christ did when he walked on this earth (Matthew 24:15). This is how I understand to be washed by his word. Grappling with the deep prophecies of Daniel and the Revelation together means we get bathed in Christ’s truth over and over again and so it helps to draw us in closer bonds of love to Christ and each other.

What advice would you give to young men and women who would like to know more about what submission and leadership really mean or who may have misconceptions about what these two things entail?

Learn of Christ the Alpha and Omega. Go to Gethsemane where the cup trembled in his hands as he breathed ‘not my will but thy will be done’. Go to Revelation where the ‘Mighty Angel,’ (Rev 10) that is Christ, leads us through ‘The advent movement of 1840-44 [which] was a glorious manifestation of the power of God; [and] the first angel’s message was carried to every missionary station in the world’ Great Controversy page 611. Some practical counsel would be if you have a mother or father do you listen to their admonitions? If you have spiritual counselors in your life do you take their Godly counsel? If you have a boss at work, do you follow instructions?  If you read (and you should do) Ministry of Healing, Counsel on Diets and Foods, Adventist Home and many more of these inspired counsels from E.G White, do you listen to the admonitions?

I know that you both had your own ministerial pursuits in addition to your joint music ministry – Advent Vison.  How have these changed, if at all, since being married?

 ‘The world is not so much in need of great minds as of good men who will be a blessing in  their homes’ Adventist Home page  37 . My home is and has been my first field. We have not went to war in our first year (Deuteronomy  24:5) and our work has been largely personal.  “Nothing can excuse the minister for neglecting the inner circle for the larger circle outside. The spiritual welfare of his family comes first…Great good done for others cannot cancel the debt that he owes to God to care for his own...’Adventist Home page 353 I still aspire for many things and through my wife God is helping me meet these goals more effectively than I could alone but just not always in the way I think. God’s ways are higher than ours.

Would you say that the ideals you had before marriage have been met in your current experience of marriage?

Yes. The counselling really helped to get a good well balanced insight/expectation.


What kind of “marriage myths” have been dispelled for you?

My marriage myths was that I needed to eat lunch at work each day. I have the privilege to eat with my wife for lunch each day.

What have you learnt about communication and dealing with conflict?

Regular communication is important. Malachi 3:16 ‘they that feared the LORD spoke often one to another.’ We spend time in the morning together talking, we text and call each other throughout the working day. We eat lunch at home each day and talk. We talk in the evenings and night J . Conflict is a choice that we chose to say no to. We sit down and talk and listen and pray about anything that may need more attention, care and communication.

A lot of people speak about “The First Year of Marriage” in term of how hard it is. They say things like “it’s the make or break”, “that’s when you get to see how the person is REALLY like” and “that’s when you realise that you may have rushed things or made a mistake.” What are your thoughts on these ideas based on your first year of marriage? What encouragement can you offer to any newlyweds who may be having this experience?

It’s certainly the ABC of marriage and a time for learning about the other person. Their likes and dislikes, their thoughts and feelings, their hopes and fears, their joys and sorrows, their strengths and weaknesses. Our nature is faulty by default but if we are born again God can beautify our soul and character. I’ve enjoyed seeing the beauty of Christ in new ways each day through my wife during this first year. These are the memories that I think upon and treasure.I would encourage newly weds to look for the good in the other.

 What are the top 3 things you have learnt during this first year of marriage?

1. God ways are higher than our own ways

2. God’s counsels on marriage through Sister Ellen G White are inspired and spot on,               so if you want a good marriage follow the counsel!

3. It is not good that man should be alone.

 Finally, what advice would you give to any young newlyweds or any couple who are engaged and about to get married?

Understand the times in which we are living first, (1 Chronicles 12:32) as we are soon reach the Midnight Cry – (Matthew 25 and Christ Object Lessons page 412)Counsel with the Bible, the Spirit of Prophecy and God fearing counsellors like you would if your physical life depended upon it and DO NOT move forward if advised not to do so from these three counsellors.And finally remember ‘the Creator joined the hands of the holy pair in wedlock, saying, A man shall “leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one,” He enunciated the law of marriage for all the children of Adam to the close of time.’ Adventist Home page 340

Thank you one again for taking part in this interview, I pray that you have many more happy years of serving God together as husband and wife.


 Not unto us, O Lord, not unto us, but unto thy name give glory, for thy mercy, 
and for thy truth's sake. 
Psalms 115:1


♥ Miss Daisy ♥