Commit thy way unto the Lord: Chiawuotu and Kimberley's love story

This summer two of my very good friends, Chaiwuotu and Kimberley, are getting married and in the lead up to their wedding I had the opportunity to interview them about their love story and how God led them together. I was able to witness their friendship and love for each other develop and I would like to share with you a love story that I believe God authored . I hope you are blessed and encouraged as you read their story J

How and when did you first meet?  

Kimberley (KH) Well… we met in several stages. I first saw Chiawuotu at prayer warriors, a youth prayer retreat in April 2008. I remember him sharing some unique poetry with enthusiasm in the program; but we never met properly. I didn’t know his name or anything about him and I wasn’t really interested in finding out.

Chiawuotu (CA)  I remember first seeing Kimberley at the summer NEC Camp Meeting in 2008, on the last day, in the last sermon. I don’t know how it came to happen because I had never met Kimberley before but we were sat next to each other, in the last sermon preached by Pastor Matt Para about ‘relationships’. Completely disinterested in relationships, I was waiting eagerly for an appeal to surrender my life to Christ and be baptised. I also asked if God would help me decide in that sermon to go to the Bible School at the Advanced Centre of Evangelism (ACE) - My prayers were answered by the close of that sermon.

KH. : And little did we know that just a few weeks later we would be attending the same four months bible school. When the Director picked me up from the station on my way to the bible school, I saw Chiawuotu sitting in the car and I said to myself, "oh, I’ve seen that person before."

CA: So eventually we actually spoke and met face to face at the Bible School which we call A.C.E



ACE 2008

Was there anything awakened in your minds about each other or were you completely neutral?

Lake District - ACE 2008

CA – When we first met, I had no attraction or feelings for Kimberley at all.

KH – Me neither, I was completely neutral but looking back I did note some good things in his character.
 
CA- I must say during ACE, I also noticed some positive character traits in Kimberley and that she really loved the Lord, but I had no interest in a relationship.
  

What were your general thoughts on courtship and marriage during this time?

CA: My thoughts were and still are that courtship is a relationship where two people become acquainted with each other’s character, and seek God’s will to know whether they should marry. It shouldn’t be too long (1 to 2 years) and it’s not the right time for physical intimacy. It is also one of the most serious and solemn decisions to be made in this life and affects the life to come!  So it’s better to get it right the first time and seek good counsel.

   KH: During the time of the Bible School, I was reminded that courtship and marriage was sacred and holy and higher than the ideals of the world. I generally felt a need to keep pure and reserved for my one future husband. In the meantime, my work was to commit to God this area and guard myself fully.



Graduation Ceremony - ACE 2008

                                                   A Safe Friendship

How did your friendship progress? Even then, as friends, was your mind opened to the possibility of a deeper friendship?

CA: One year later (2009) our paths crossed and we worked together in the same Bible School. We worked in the kitchen as cooks and with the students as deans and Bible teachers. It was a very practical and hands on way to have a friendship but it was strictly business like. After the four-month school we went different ways.

Working together in the Kitchen - ACE 2009

KH; In 2009 during this second phase of our friendship, I began to value Chiawuotu's support and leadership very much and I did contemplate the possibility of a deeper friendship but I guarded myself against this because while it wasn't for me to initiate anything in the first place, I also did not think that either of us were spiritually mature enough. I made sure to read a lot about true relationships (I especially read Counsels on Courtship and Marriage) in order to keep my affections guarded and I thought it best not to encourage any communication after the school.

CA: I knew nothing about this whatsoever. I certainly was not considering marriage. I wanted to finish my education, travel as a missionary and work for a few years before I considered a relationship.

So how did your friendship progress after 2009?

KH: We were out of touch for a few months (except once or twice) and then I was invited by Chiawuotu to come for one day, in 2010, to support a Campus Ministry initiative, on a University not too far away.

 CA:  Oh yes. I remember that. (smiles) I really did appreciate Kimberley’s willingness to help. After that we next met at a UK prophecy school in autumn 2010, where I think the now Advent Vision members sang together for the first time.




Advent Vision 2014

KH: Then towards the end of 2011/ beginning 2012, I was invited by Chiawuotu to officially work together in a core team of 3 to 5 young people as a music ministry.  I knew there was a strong possibility that our friendship may progress so after praying earnestly and informing my parents I joined the ministry.

CA: Yes I think our friendship progressed as we ministered together in song. I saw more of her lovely character and a glimpse into how Christ was adorning her inner life.

What boundaries did you put in place in order to have a healthy male female friendship while remaining open to the will of God? 

CA: Kimberley was so reserved from day one that I trembled for months in 2012/13 thinking about how she would respond if I told her that I was interested in courting her. This reserved behaviour help me to do a lot of serious spiritual reflection and seek spiritual counsel before even approaching her.

KH: I put up a wall. We always spoke and dealt with each other very business-like, communicating only to achieve something tangible and definite (e.g. mission work, music cd, organising etc) instead of aimless social talk. Also I tried not to be around Chiawuotu too much. Before joining together in a music ministry with Chiawuotu, I knew we would spend more time together so I kept my parents and close friends informed and updated so they could help me stay guarded. I was transparent with my parents from 2010/11 about our friendship at every stage.  Also, about the time that I realised that my affections were being called out and before I became too involved in the Advent Vision ministry, I providentially met Chiawuotu’s Mum and family and learnt more about his character and their characters. Because of all of these safeguards I felt safe as our friendship developed.


Drawn By His Loving Kindness 

 How did you deal with your growing feelings for each other?



Germany 2014

CA: Well I know expression deepens impression and so until I knew it was safe, I did not express my feelings to Kimberley at all. I dealt with my feelings through prayer and receiving spiritual counsel but without Kimberley’s knowledge.  I talked to my Mum a lot, who was a great help to me. And spent a lot of time reading Adventist Home and Letters to Young Lovers and Messages to Young People. This turned my mind to the responsibilities involved in marriage, which also helped me to control my feelings and not run ahead too quickly.

KH; I was as open as possible with God, parents and close family and friends but closed to Chiawuotu as much as possible and sometimes I think I came across rude.

How did you seek out the will of God in order to get answers about your growing feelings and friendship?

CA: I prayed and read, I read and prayed. I also sought a lot of counsel from parents, church members and friends. These were my three main pillars. I also analysed Kimberley’s character very closely and carefully where possible. 

KH: Exactly the same. Initially I spent time reading and then counselling with people I respected that knew me well and that would give me a Christian perspective. Prayer was key.

Why did you choose to counsel with others? 

CA: I know sometimes counselling with parents; church members and friends can seem like an obstacle in the path of a chosen relationship or even just a grudging formality. But I truly saw the blessing in considering and weighing their counsels. Their counsels were like apples of gold and silver. It was like standing on the shoulders of those who have more foresight and prudence so that I could foresee the difficulties, challenges and even blessings, which may lie further along this relationship path.

KH: With such an important decision, I knew I couldn't trust simply my feelings or my own perspective and I really valued the opinions of those who knew me best and who had helped me in the past. Most especially, I needed my parents to approve and love Chiawuotu to know God was leading. The positive responses from all counsellors really helped me to have confidence and discernment in the way God was leading. Without them I would not have been able to understand Gods leading so clearly. It really helped me to move forward.


Commit thy Way Unto The Lord

What evidence did you need to specifically see in Kimberley to know whether God was leading her to be your wife? And what solidified your decision?



ACE 2009

CA: I needed to see the evidence of her love for God in her speech, actions and manners. I needed to see the walking fulfilment of a virtuous woman outlined in Proverbs 31 and the spirit of prophecy, to know God was leading.

 What evidence did you need to specifically see in Chiawuotu to know whether God was leading him to be your Husband? And what were some of the things that solidified your decision? 

Working in the garden - Nigeria 2014

KH:  I needed to see that Chiawuotu could go through difficulty and hardship for the truth's sake. I needed to see that Chiawuotu would care for my spiritual life and show concern for my spiritual goals. I needed evidence that Chiawuotu would be able to be patient with my mistakes and speak kindly even at these times. And though I saw all these evidences, it was still not easy to decide in the positive, but I knew God was leading. God would constantly affirm my decisions through scripture after scripture. 

Then finally I held out a 'Gideon’s fleece' by asking God to lay the idea of a dowry on Chiawuotu's heart and around the time of our engagement God graciously answered my prayer. 

Chiawuotu, tell us how you asked Kimberley to enter into a courtship with you?

  First I told Kimberley that I wanted to speak to her parents, then after parental permission face to face, I asked Kimberley on the telephone if she would court me.  Kim asked me quite a few questions on my idea of courtship and after I passed her quiz, she said yes.

Courtship and Engagement Story 



Advent Vision's first album

KH: Our courtship involved a lot of ministry work together. During this time, we completed our first Advent Vision cd ‘Dear Pilgrim’ and travelled to many churches and meetings across the UK and the globe sharing the third angel in song. Some of our favourite memories are when we were in Sheffield, Slovakia, Germany, Oregon and Nigeria.

CA: It’s a great blessing to see how God can use us together to bring joy to others, which perhaps we couldn’t do in the same way if we were alone. One highlight for me was speaking to Kimberley’s Dad for permission to court. I was so nervous that the words did not come out of my mouth properly, yet Kimberley’s Dad was kind and used humour to help me cough out my question.

KH: I also appreciated Chiawuotu’s encouragement in my personal challenges and getting to know each others family.

Both:  Oh and we both are learning, just how important it is to work together, blend, submit, forbear and be patient.

Working together - Nigeria 2014

The Marriage Proposal 

KH: God asked me first if I would marry Chiawuotu, a few weeks before Chiawuotu did. I told my parents my thoughts and I made a decision during this time, which enabled me to give a prompt answer when Chiawuotu asked a few weeks later. ( 3rd January 2014).



In the pineapple field - Nigeria 2014

CA: Well I proposed at the beginning of this year in Germany. We were at a bible meeting and one morning Kimberley asked if she could join me on my morning devotion walk.  I had spoken with her Dad the day before on the telephone and he had given me permission to ask Kimberley to marry me. But Kimberley did not know.  After personal devotion and then a communal nature devotion together, we knelt down to pray on the top of a hill, amidst the beautiful sloping hills and singing birds.  I prayed first and thanked God for her and being able to speak with her Dad, and then asked if she would marry me  (with our eyes closed still praying).


KH: Then when I heard I was so surprised. I opened my eyes and said  ‘Of course I will..ehemm’ No I should respond by prayer. Then I closed my eyes and said yes in prayer.

CA: Then we joyfully stood to our feet and asked again and responded again and then went to the next bible meeting for the day.

Soon to be Mr and Mrs Anyanwu -  Nigeria 2014

Now you’re getting married this summer, what would you say your vision, mission or purpose in marriage will be? What influence do you hope your marriage union will have on others as well as yourselves? 

KH: My vision is that we would be sealed for Gods kingdom, and my influence will help Chiawuotu heavenward and that our relationship would have a saving influence on all our family and friends to be also saved in the Kingdom. My mission and purpose is to support Chiawuotu with his life work, and to make a happy functioning home, which will be a blessing to our community and even to the ends of the world.

CA: My vision is to win as many souls for Christ through my family ministry in song, sermon, saving health and most importantly our ‘living testimony’. It’ s our mission to use our time, talents and means to further Gods cause and allow God to reproduce His character in us so we can hopefully ‘go to our heaven bound home.’

Smile - Nigeria 2014

Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.
Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. 

Psalms 37:4-5



You can follow Chiawuotu and Kimberley's journey at www.chiawuotuandkimberley.weebly.com

Thanks for reading!

Love, your girl forever,

♥ Miss Daisy ♥

25 Things I have learnt in 25 years.

Sunday  18^th May marked my 25^th birthday so I thought I would share 25 things I have learnt in 25 years – probably one of my longest posts to date but in no particular order here they are;

1) Money isn’t everything but it is something –   Money definitely isn’t the be all and end all but if you have it, it pays to use it wisely. I’m learning to be a better steward of my money by budgeting, avoiding debt, making a clear distinction between my wants and my needs, saving, tithing and being a more conscious spender.

2) Busy lifestyle? Always, always take time out – I’ve accepted that I have a somewhat busy lifestyle in addition to my day job I have other projects and commitments. I’ve learnt how important it is to hit that pause button and take some time out to just… breathe. Not too long ago I took a week off work just so I could spend time at home, do some reading, catch up with friends, spend time with God etc. Life can get busy but the aim is not to completely burn yourself out, when needed take some time out.

3) Social Media has a dark side – I am definitely not against social media, I love the many things it offers e.g. blogs J. I have, however, learnt about the dark side of social media - you know, the endless hours trolling on different social media profiles and comparing your life to what you are seeing and becoming discontent. This has made me assess my own motivates when posting pictures, statuses and comments – “what kind of life am I really trying to portray?” Also if someone’s profile is becoming a distraction (no fault of their own) I need to be prepared to click that hide, block, delete, unfriend or block button.

4) I'm not happy being single, I'm happy… period – I think I’ll save the explanation of this amazing lesson for another blog post J

5) Our thoughts follows our words – Have you ever been praying for God to help you overcome a certain habit, thought or vice and when you have finished your prayer you find yourself thinking about the very thing you’re trying to overcome? I’ve learnt that instead of saying things like “help me God to stop lying, cheating and stealing” say things like “Help me God to be honest, pure in heart, giving, loving”. Your brain is hearing all these positive words and this will have an impact on your thoughts.

6) Aim high and spare no pains to reach the standard – Not many things in this life come easy, the things that are worth having often come at a cost and require hard work, sacrifice, patience and sometimes even pain. Don’t shun the process though it may seem difficult, keep striving towards the end goal, in retrospect the journey will prove to be a blessing when you finally reach that finish line.

7) True love is a high and holy principle, altogether different in character from that love which is awakened by impulse, and which suddenly dies when severely tested. – Simply put love is not a feeling but a principle (1 Corinthians 13) it stands strong and reminds consistent in all situations.

8) Get to know your friends well, it could save your friendships – Sometimes we place quite demanding expectations on our friends and when they fail to meet them it can cause such a separation. I’m learning not to just end friendships but to rather re-evaluate them,  for example if you know your friend likes to gossip then choose not to tell them things about yourself and others, if you have a friend who is quite blunt and outspoken choose not to take it personally or if you have a friend who you know is quite sensitive and easily offended don’t get frustrated just choose your words and your tone carefully.

9) Though I sometimes find it difficult to have faith, faith is actually a really simple concept - God’s word has creative power, when He speaks it happens and that’s it. When we exercise faith we totally depend on and trust in God’s word – He has said it therefore it shall be regardless of the circumstances or improbabilities. I’m learning that to cultivate faith is to take God at His word only.

10) Don’t be afraid to build bridges - This year I’ve seen the importance of building bridges with those I interact with often e.g.  Neighbours, landlords, work colleagues, mobile phone service providers etc. For example my neighbours,  I try to be kind and courteous towards them and to respect their peace and privacy and as a result they help me out a lot: They check on me if they haven’t seen me for a while, look after my parcels when the postman comes and I’m not at home  and sometimes pick me up from the coach station when I’ve come back from travelling. This all may sound like I’m doing this for my own gain but as a part of building bridges I also have a duty to help them however possible.  

11) True beauty is found in the character but looks are important too – When considering a potential spouse I’ve learnt their character traits should be the deciding factor but not to the neglect of looks. We all have different personalities, likes, dislikes etc. These shouldn’t be completely ignored but should be carefully considered when looking at their character. At the same time I’ve seen that a decision shouldn’t be purely based on looks as people’s physical appearances changes over time.

12) Optimal health is not only found in good nutrition – Good health isn’t only found in good food or the perfect diet;  other factors should be considered such as daily exercise, pure fresh air, lots of water, plenty of rest, temperance, sunlight and also trusting in God as He is the very source of life. Even if I have the best diet if I neglect any of these other things I won’t be in optimal health.

13) Not all counsel is Godly counsel I have been told many things over the years but I’ve learnt that all counsel has to be measured up to the bible. I remember when my friends with great love and concern told me that I will never find someone living in Wales and I need to travel around more and go to different churches and look for people my age (the congregation at the church I attend regularly comprises of mainly married people and little children). I almost ran with that advice until I remembered that it wasn’t biblical - God doesn’t want me to find “somebody”,  He wants to give me the person who He has purposed for me and He will do this for me regardless of where I live and the places I go. Look at Rebekah in the bible one day she is at the well and the next she is on her way to meet her husband to be Isaac (Genesis 24)

14) Don’t get involved in office politics – The workplace can be a serious political arena, I’m learning not to get involved in any workplace scandals or gossip. The best thing is to be neutral (don’t take sides, don’t comment on any situations or add fuel to the fire) and just get on with the work; because essentially that’s the reason why I am there - to work! 

15) Anything worth doing is worth doing well  I want to do big things in this life, but I often ask myself “Am I faithful in the little things?” like cleaning up after myself, following simple instructions, seeing a need and catering for it without being asked? These little tasks as menial as they may feel, are of a high value as they teach us and prepare us for greater responsibilities. Let’s make every task count and give all things our best effort. 

My 22nd Birthday

16) It’s all about me! Really? Yes! In every situation you have to look at yourself and evaluate your actions, responses, words and feelings. If I have a disagreement with someone, I’m learning to not look at the other person and what they did but to look at my role in the situation – what did I do? How am I responding to this situation? What could I have done to avoid this situation? Even if you are clearly not in the wrong, you need to take responsibility for your own actions – why? Every situation, whatever it may be, is developing your character and it’s only you who has control over your words, actions, responses etc.

17) Human rights/religious liberty isn’t that straight forward – I’ve read a few news articles that have shown me  just how much we are at the mercy of those who give us these rights and liberties; meaning that they can be taken away from us without prior warning or explanation. I have also seen that the exercise of one’s rights or freedom of expression is only valid if it conforms to what society deems as acceptable. Let us therefore seek liberty in Christ – freedom from sin, power to do the right, freedom of conscience , this is a free gift that will never be taken away even if we lose all our rights and liberties in this world.

18) The gospel is the antithesis of the human mind - I love the way the gospel just turns things upside down and presents concepts that completely go against our human thinking: There is life in death (John 12:47), everything is nothing (Philippians 3:7-9)  , the highest position is found in being a servant to others (Matthew 23:11),  if someone slaps you on your left cheek give them the right one (Matthew 5:39). The word of God shows me how much I need to change my thinking especially  living in a world that looks down on attributes like patience, meekness, gentleness, humility etc  the very things God esteems.

19) Keep a daily journal  -When I was younger I always thought a diary was for writing about the boys you like, the people you hate and your deep dark secrets. The thought of having a diary and then someone finding it and reading it to the whole class was enough for me to hate the whole idea. I recently started journaling as part of my morning quiet time with God. I love to write and I thought this would be a good way to write down things I've learnt that morning, prayers, thanksgivings and just generally document my Christian journey. If you haven't tried journaling I am personally recommending it to you! When you look back at what you have written it is amazing to see how much God has led and the amount of progress you have made. You will see how God helped you get through sad times and how he blessed you with happy times. Journaling doesn't have to be boring - you can use colours, pictures, stickers, highlighters, themes etc you can make it a daily, weekly, fortnightly or monthly journal, the choice is yours. Give it a try, you won't regret it!

20) Don’t go against your conscience to content the people – The Roman Governor Pontius Pilate is written in the history books of my mind for the role he played in the cruixfiction of Jesus Christ. Matthew 27, Mark 23, Luke 23 and John 18 and 19 tell a story of a man who went against his own conscience and what he thought was right, just to pacify the people. Pilate knew that Jesus was an innocent man and that the Jewish Nation were sentencing him to death out of envy and malice. Pilate had the power to release Jesus yet yielded to the demands of the angry mob and handed Jesus over to them. Pilate tried everything to have Jesus released – except the right thing. This story presents such a great lesson – I need to stand firmly for the right and not make any decisions (especially a wrong one) just to content the people.

My 23rd Birthday

21) There is life and then there is life – This is another powerful lesson that I will save for another blog post but I’ll give you a little taste –I'm such a big foodie, I love food especially food that is healthy and full of energy and life giving properties. However I've learnt that there is something else that gives much more energy and a different kind of life -   “Man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God” Matthew 4:4 and “....I have esteemed the words of his mouth more than my necessary food” Job 23:12  

22) Don’t mould your character around those who you only see once a week  - This is definitely real! Many people (including myself) have fallen into that trap of talking, acting, dressing and even thinking a certain way in order to appease those who they see at church or in religious circles. It’s so sad and it’s bondage the fact that we can’t be ourselves as we are constantly morphing and being pretentious. We try so hard to appear spotless in front of those who we only see once a week yet we don’t make this same effort in the sight of a holy God who sees everything. Remember – 1) Christ is our standard and not man 2) you don’t know how people are outside of religious circles and in secret 3) more than likely the people you are morphing for are probably not interested in what you are doing anyway.

23) Learn a practical trade – The world has changed so much that there was a time when all women knew how to sew, cook, grow food and fix things around the house and all men knew how to make a honest wage with their hands. I think it pays to learn a practical trade no matter what age you are. Book knowledge is good but nothing beats practical skills that can be used all through life and probably anywhere in the world. The world’s economy is wearing thin and many people will find that those with a practical trade will be in a much better position if the world faces some sort of financial crisis.  

24) Spending time with God each morning is essential for spiritual growth – At the beginning of 2014 I purposed in my heart to wake up early every morning and spend time with God. I have struggled greatly with this over the years - I couldn’t be consistence, sometimes I felt bored or tired, I would read and nothing would go in etc. However when I read Mark 1:35 I realised that Jesus himself when he was in the flesh saw the absolute necessity in coming before God each morning to spend time in prayer, study and meditation. I have been doing this consistently for 5 months now and it has changed my life! I feel alive! God feels real to me, He is my dearest friend, I speak to Him and He speaks to me, I’m understanding the bible more, my days run more smoothly, things don’t irritate me as much, I feel more patient and loving and much more. Friends, I will definitely blog about this in more detail but if you feel spiritually dead or far away from God start spending time with him each morning and be intentional about it. God will give you strength not only do it and be consistent with it but to delight and find pleasure in being in his presence.

25) Smile, you don’t own all the world’s problems - There’s so much to be thankful for and there is always something to smile about! When feeling down or completely stressed out remind yourself of the most dearest and precious things in life and that, at the very least, you are greatly loved by your Father in heaven.

My 25th Birthday

 I am so thankful for life! I am especially thankful for the life of Christ and for everything that He has been to me these past 25 years. I am thankful for my friends and family for their influence and encouragement - you all have truly been an answer to prayer. 

 I will sing unto the LORD as long as I live: I will sing praise to my God while I have my being. My meditation of him shall be sweet: I will be glad in the LORD. 

Psalms 104:33-34

Love, your girl forever,

♥ Miss Daisy ♥

From the beginning until the end

It’s Natalie’s 25^th Birthday today, so I decided to take a trip down memory lane.

Natalie at the London Aquarium on my 23rd birthday 

Natalie and I have known each other for years, yet I can’t actually pinpoint how we become friends. We met at the age of 14/15 at a summer theatre club, we attended the same sixth form college and even went to the same university. However it was in our final year of university that Natalie became more than just a long-time friend, she became a sister.

OK, quick story!

So Natalie and I started at Brunel University in 2007, I remember us squashing up in my parents’ car with all our luggage and making our way to our halls of residence. Though we were studying for different degrees, Natalie and I both had the same university plan - 3 years in university and a 1 year work placement between our 2nd and 3^rd year of studies. This meant we would both start and finish together.

That was the plan, but this is what really happened; Natalie did the first 2 years as normal and then went on to do her placement year, after her placement she took a gap year to work and then came back for her final year in 2011. Her situation meant that she wouldn’t have graduated with me, however my university plans changed too. Like Natalie I did my first 2 years as normal and then took a gap year to do missionary work, I still wanted to do an internship so after my gap year I did my placement and went back to university for my final year in 2011. Looking back I definitely believe God’s hand brought us together for our final year as situations should have lead us to finish university at different times.

Natalie and I during our first week of university

Final year was definitely a turning point in our friendship, we had somewhat drifted apart during our 1^st and 2^nd year but came back together strong. We supported each other during the most difficult times as we battled through the stresses of dissertations, coursework and exams while dealing with other things in our personal lives.  We spent most of that year in between each other’s halls; If Natalie wasn’t staying at my place I would be staying at hers.  We used to always say “Tonight, we’re definitely going to have an early night, wake up at 6am and get to the library for when it opens at 8am”; we tried so hard to keep to that but it never happened because as soon as we got into bed we would always end up talking most of the night! Our friendship during that year taught me how powerful it is, as a friend, to just be there.  Even now as I write this I am smiling about all the precious moments we have shared together.

Natalie, you have been more than a friend to me, even a sister. Your love and commitment to God really inspires me; I’ll never forget when deadlines were piling up and you were under extreme amounts of pressure yet you never neglected prayer, reading your bible or going to church. I’m thankful for your life - your determination, your loving kindness and your vibrant nature made such a rocky journey smooth. Keep pressing on Natalie, stay true to God as he has such wonderful things prepared for you. You have been a true friend from the beginning and I pray we may continue on this journey together until the end.

 

Happy Birthday Natalie

 

Natalie and I on our mini holiday celebrating the end of university :)

 

"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose."

Romans 8:28
 

 

Love, your girl forever,

 ♥ Miss Daisy  ♥

How are you doing spiritually?

At the beginning of the year I was catching up with my good friend Hannah. We were messaging each other back and forth as it had been a very long time since we last spoke. At the end of one of her messages she asked me the question “How are you doing spiritually?”

What? Is that even a question that can be asked? I have never been asked such a straight question regarding my walk with God however I admired the directness of the question. This question awakened a lot of trust and transparency and I began to relate to Hannah, quite candidly, experiences from the past year (2013).I was open about my hopes, my fears, my struggles and my victories and in return she openly shared her experience. It’s very interesting because some of the things she expressed I could definitely relate to, and I was very encouraged as I often used to think that I was the only one who thought a certain way or went through a certain thing,  but I was able to see that there are others who go through similar things too. Our conversation definitely dispelled any myths or preconceived ideas we had about each other and we both committed to praying for each other.

During that week I began to think about our conversation and the question she asked. It made me think – How often do I ask my friends about their walk with God? Their temporal/physical well being is definitely important, hence why I ask “how are you doing?” “How is work going”? “Did you manage to pay that thing off?” “Have you settled into your new house yet?” etc. How much more important is their spiritual well being? Should I not be just as concerned? So that week I decided that I am going to make a habit of enquiring about the spiritual well being of my friends and family at appointed opportunities.

It’s very important to me as I've realised that we as human being often operate on a “don’t ask, don’t tell” basis. If Hannah never asked me that direct question about my spiritual life it’s more than likely that I wouldn't have said anything even if she asked “How’s your life going or how are you generally?”  It’s very important to me as I remember a few years back I wasn't doing too good spiritually, I was making a load of bad decisions and pretty much weaving a tangled web for myself. I remember feeling like I couldn't speak to anybody; I thought to myself no one will understand, who can really relate? At that time it felt like everyone around me was going from strength to strength on their Christian journey and I was scared to approach anyone as I felt that maybe they would judge me and say “How can you be thinking/feeling this way?” “How could you let this happen, you should have known better!” so in my mind it felt easier to just put on a pretence and act like everything was OK. Obviously it’s very unlikely that any of my friends or family would have acted in this way, but those were some of the barriers that kept me from speaking to anybody or seeking encouragement during that time. However I do wonder, if I was asked back then the question “how are you doing spiritually?” would I have had the courage to answer that question and ask for prayer and guidance? Is that what it would have taken, just someone to simply ask?

When it comes to our friends and family, obviously everyone’s walk with God is personal to themselves and God is their strength and helper in all things. However we can do our part as friends and take notice and care for their spiritual well being, pray for specific things in their life and encourage them through our conversations with them and through sharing scripture.

So today, if you are reading this, I encourage you to take the time when conversing with friends and family to enquire about their spiritual well being. Ask them “how are you doing spiritually?”, “How is your Christian journey going?” etc. It may come as a shock to some people as it is something that is rarely asked, but I can tell you from my own experience, the question was much appreciated, it meant a lot to me and made quite an impact.

"Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much." 

James 5:16

Love, your girl forever,

♥ Miss Daisy ♥