Birthday Blues

So today is my 29th birthday!!! I can’t believe I have reached the final year of my 20’s…eeeeekkkkk!!!! 

I am so thankful for this day and my heart is filled with so much gratitude as I look back at God’s goodness towards me! However, I wanted to write this blog post as it hasn’t always been a “happy birthday".

Last year on my birthday I was miserable! So miserable that I almost refused to go out with my friends and family that day.  I had a bad case of the birthday blues and it all stemmed from feelings of discontent and inadequacy. I kept on thinking to myself “I am 28 years old and I haven’t done this and that”, “Most people my age are in such and such a position”, “It’s too late for me to do this now”, “I feel like a failure”.  

Honestly! All these thoughts were running through my mind and I genuinely believed them to be true. 

Have you ever felt this way? Not just on your birthday but any day? 

I just want to encourage you....

When we feel like this God calls to our hearts to come to him for perspective. 

Why? 

Because most of the time some of these thoughts are based upon unrealistic expectations we put on ourselves, and unfortunately these expectations often don’t line up with our current reality.  

Let me give an example...

One of the things I was really down about last year was not having massive savings. I believed a lot of people my age had enough savings to buy a house or to help them out in a huge emergency…..but that wasn’t me.  

When speaking with a friend about it she reminded me that I can’t compare my situation to others. She said “Daisy, I can afford to put loads of money away in my savings account as I still live with my parents, I don’t pay any rent or bills and I walk to work etc. You on the other hand, don’t live with your parents, you have your own place and you pay for everything  yourself so it’s natural that you won’t always have huge amounts of money to put towards savings after you’ve met essentials."

Can you see what I mean about perspective? 

Don’t be so hard on yourself! Don’t compare your life or current situation to others, or the standards of society or whatever else…take your problem to the Lord and ask for some perspective and a reality check. 

I have truly gained perspective in this area and now my whole approach and altitude has changed. Now instead of feeling sad about my lack of savings I just save as much as I can and trust in the Lord. God is always providing so I need to remember that my hope is in him and not in my savings account.   

So if you ever have a case of the birthday blues or just life blues in general, take some time out with the lord to work through these concerns and ask him to show you the reality alongside his will for you.  

You may feel like you’re well into your 30’s and not married yet…. 

Ask the Lord to show you your heart, are you feeling this way because your friends are all getting married? Are you even ready for marriage? Are your ideals of marriage in line with what the bible teaches? Where does the idea come from that being single in your 30’s is a bad thing? Is this what the bible teaches? 

You may feel like you hate your job and just want better opportunities….  

Are you being faithful even now in  your current job, or are you doing just enough to get by? Are you actively doing things that put yourself  in a position to be available for better opportunities? Are you proactive in seeking for opportunities? Don’t expect anyone to approach you, sometimes you have to put yourself forward and make it known you are available for opportunities and further development.  

You may feel like you're far from God and your Christian walk is not what it used to be…  

How is your devotional life? Where is your heart? What is filling up your time and especially your mind? Are you engaging in things or hanging around with people who are drawing you away from God? Do you renew your mind daily with the word of God? Remember you can’t live off of last week’s bible study.   

At the end of my birthday last year (after spending the evening with my friends and family *smiles*) I remember going to bed with the lesson that life doesn’t always work out the way we want it to,  and things don’t always work out according to the way we have mapped it out or the timings we have set forth, however we can rest assured and have full confidence in God as he has promised to direct our path.  

Here are some scriptures of encouragement  

Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.  

Psalm 37: 4-5 

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. 

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.  

Psalm 3: 5-6 

A man's heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps 

Proverbs 16: 9 

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. 

Jeremiah 29:11 

Yes, so no birthday blues today, just pure and utter gratitude and overflowing love.

Love, your girl forever,

♥ Miss Daisy ♥  

Victory is through surrender

So my current career is in Computing and ICT. I am more passionate about other things but this is what I do at the moment to make a living. I currently work in a team of 7 in ICT Support; we are the people you contact when “something is not working!”. When I first started my job, I was in a team of 3, the 3rd person was my manager so technically I was in a team of 2 so it was just my colleague, let’s call him Samuel,  and I.

**Disclaimer**

This is a character building experience/lesson  that the Lord has put me through and I am not here to suggest this is something someone else should do or that this is the best thing to do. I am just sharing my own personal experience hoping that we will be able to learn more about submission and surrender. Also just to add that this is nothing to do with love or romantic relationships but simply respect and submission and there is no communication or relationship or romantic feelings  outside of this context.

Sorry! Disclaimers are so awkward  but have to be done, to find out what I am talking about keep reading :)

I personally find the Computing , IT and Technical industry to be a very male dominated area, and often times women can feel trampled upon and undermined in terms of knowledge and experience. I don’t believe this is every woman’s experience in this field but I have witnessed and experienced these things, so when I started this role I wasn’t surprised when me and my male colleague started to clash a little bit.

I found that he was always taking over; he used to do things like,  if I was dealing with a user and was finding it difficult to resolve an IT issue, he would just completely take over and I would be pushed into the background not really knowing the steps he was taking to resolve the issue. Also if he was showing me how to do something he would often grab the mouse out of my hand and do it for me. I also found that my judgment and decisions would always be either questioned or seen as wrong. It became quite difficult to deal with because in my mind I thought if I wasn’t qualified enough or didn’t know what I was doing why would they have employed me.

After a while, I guess I started to rebel. I started to do my own thing and wouldn’t listen to his suggestions or take his help. If I did take his help, I wouldn’t do it with a sincere heart. When he would grab my mouse I would grab it back. I began to make my frustrations very clear. This obviously was not a good approach at all as we are both there to work as a team to support the service.  

I remember one day, the situation became so overwhelming that I ran to the toilet almost in tears. I was so upset and I was praying and asking the Lord how am I supposed to cope with all of this, I am here 5 times a week so it is something I have to deal with almost every day. I really wished my colleague would change and stop trying to take over and control everything.

In that moment God opened my heart and I remember being impressed that I just have to submit.

What?

I have to stop rebelling and just surrender. The Lord was calling me to just submit to him.

Why?

I was given 3 reasons

1. He’s a man
2. He’s older than me
3. He has been in this job for a number of years and has more experience and knowledge in this area.

This was a hard answer for me to take in as I knew that I just wanted my colleague to change, but I realised that I needed to change. Sometimes when we start a new job, ministry, project etc. We often come like we have arrived and often don’t want to humble ourselves and learn from those who have a bit more experience and foreknowledge than us. We trust too much in our own knowledge and experience and that becomes our ruler.   I needed to change my approach to the situation and realise that I couldn’t win by fighting him. The Lord wanted me to understand the paradox that victory is through surrender.

From that day I started to change my approach, when he would tell me something I would listen and welcome his suggestions. When he would start taking over or would grab my mouse,  I would let him and try and learn and observe what he was doing to resolve the issue.

God is so good as honestly, we now have the best working relationship ever! We both support each other in our roles, we share knowledge and also support each other in personal matters e.g If I need to leave work early last minute, he is happy to stay behind and cover me and vice versa. I don’t feel in anyway that he tries to take over and he doesn’t grab my mouse anymore :). Also I have found that he often asks for my suggestion and goes with decisions that I make. We have developed mutual respect for each other. I have also developed in my career and technical knowledge because of our interactions. It’s such a blessing to know that you can work with someone in a team and not clash or have to fight.  I believe this  blessing came from surrender. People may be asking “Well what about him?!?!” I can’t look at him or expect him to change his behaviour, that is out of my control but I can change my own behaviour and set the example as a Christian. It is powerful to see how my part alone and following God’s counsel has produced such positive results.

This experience has taught me so much about submission in a marriage and has changed my perspective. I used to view submission as control and total domination but now I view it as respect, protection, honour and trust. There are times when Samuel will tell me that I need to do “such and such” to resolve an issue and in my mind I am screaming, “This is not going to work!!!”, I go ahead and do it anyway, and it does work! I am seeing the wisdom of God in submission, and it is teaching me to learn to trust in the judgement of others, as I will not always have the right answer.

Just to reiterate, as I don’t want to be misunderstood, there are no romantic feelings here and our interactions do not go beyond working hours. I have grown to respect Samuel as an individual and as a professional and I want nothing but the best for him professionally and also that he may give his heart to Christ :). I just wanted to share this experience as I am thankful for the Lord’s leading in this area, and for his unfathomable wisdom in teaching me this great lesson and for making my working environment a pleasant place to be.

Victory is through surrender!

…. nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.

Luke 22: 42

Love, your girl forever,

♥ Miss Daisy ♥  

Victory

How can I win if I surrender?

How can I fight if I die?

This paradox seems like a mystery,

Is it possible to win if I lose?

How can win if I surrender?

How can I fight if I die?

On that lonely evening at Gethsemane,  

The battle of all ages was fought for you and me,

Victory is through surrender!

Jesus said not my will but thine be done,

Jesus found victory is through surrender

I can win when I surrender

I can fight because you died

This paradox is not a mystery

I die so you can live within me

Victory is mine when I surrender.

Lord I surrender all to you.

Jared and Zac Caster

Miss Daisy's Petals is now on social media!

It's been just over 5 years blogging and its time to develop and grow!

I have decided to set up two social media accounts for this blog. So if you are on Facebook or Instagram you can like my page/follow me at:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/missdaisyspetals/

Instragram: @missdaisyspetals

There is so much I want to share with you and I am looking forward to the future. There are lots of exciting things to come from Miss Daisy's Petals!

Looking forward to connecting with you all.

Love, your girl forever,

♥ Miss Daisy ♥

Everybody likes to be liked

Happy new year one and all! 

...Wow, that's how long it's been!

It's has been a few months since I wrote on here. I guess it’s been a cross between not being motivated to write and also going through a huge transitional period (I hope to share more about this soon) that has kept me “MIA”.

Nevertheless I’m here for this moment :)

I want to write candidly about an area that has been pressing on my heart.

A LOT has been going on in and around me and it has really revealed an inward struggle within my heart. As the earth continues to degrade and as the wickedness and corruption in this world reaches higher heights, I am beginning to conceptualise the harsh realities of what it means to be a Christian.

I guess I have always known that being a Christian means standing tall and often standing alone, but I’m beginning to sink into the realisation  that standing for Christ, his word and his truth goes hand in hand with persecution.

But why I am even surprised?

The bible does say “…and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution.” 2 Timothy 3:12

I’m surprised because the reality is, deep down…I want Christ but not persecution.

But can a servant be greater than her master?

“Remember the word that I said unto you, The servant is not greater than his lord. If they have persecuted me, they will also persecute you…” John 15: 20

If Christ suffered persecution then who am I to shun it?

I’m feeling so pressed and pushed by the idea that this is not something I can run from or avoid…unless I let go of Jesus all together?

God promises many things in his word, but not freedom from persecution for his name sake.

He promises Victory!

But not without warfare.

So here I am….

Anxious

Afraid

Yet greatly loved and comforted.

Another reality I need to settle into is that there is nothing that Christ is asking me to pass through that he himself has not gone through or willing to do. The path before me has already been trod.

So this is my prayer…

Lord, your grace is sufficient…help me to stand bold for you and for the truth. Help me to hold fast to my convictions…no matter the cost. Indeed, whatever may befall me is such a small price to pay compared to all you have done for me.

In Jesus Name, Amen

Everybody likes to be liked…but that’s not what’s promised.

Love, your girl forever,

♥ Miss Daisy ♥